Advice

Be quick to listen, slow to speak...
-James 1:19

Advice to me is like a double edged sword; it could really help you, encourage you, and build you up, or it can confuse you, and tear you down. Alot of my friends rag on me for not taking their advice. It's actually becoming more like a joke really, "oh, I dont know why I'm wasting my breath, I know you're not going to take it!" they all say.

Sometimes though, I dont even ask for it! I just need a listening ear. Take this example for instance...

Me- "Hey guys, I'm really excited about my paper I'm writing for my english class. It's going to be a 10 page paper on the mythological, and religious aspects of star wars! Here's the thesis I came up with...."

Friend A - "Ahh man, that thesis is wrong! You should really focus more on..."

Me - "No I dont know, I think this could work. I was getting excited about it!"

Friend B - "No Eric, Friend A is right! That won't work!"

Friend A- "Yeah, you ask for our advice, and you don't take it!" 

Situations like this, their input is fine, but I wasn't asking for any advice! Alot of times, I think, people mistake "need a listening ear" for "need someone to sweep in and fix the situation!" Sometimes I go away from these 'therapy sessions' feeling more confused and frustrated, because the person would be opinionated, brash, or tell me something that is completely from left field!

I think listening is the best form of "advice" you can give someone. We really just need to talk our problems out for a couple of hours with someone else encouraging, presenting ideas, praying, and supporting. Maybe after a couple of hours, we would figure out the answer ourselves. Which leads me to the next point!

The best person that could give us advice, is ourselves. If you think about it our situation's are so unique and so personalized, that others might have a hard time to decipher the problem and relate to it. Sometimes when I ask for advice to friends, I feel like they are saying "oh thats easy Eric! It's like stealing candy from a baby! All you do is...."  But they just have no idea! It would be so cool if I could discuss my problems with another version of myself. Possibly even my future self. Maybe he would have a monotone, and an annoying slight resemblence of Obama, but the difference would be he would be wiser.